A Tribute to Mothers Everywhere
Okay, so in honor of mothers everywhere I'm here to give a little advice. It's Mother's Day. You've been trying to figure out what to do for your mother and it's the afternoon now so chances are you've screwed it up already. So, take what I am going to write here and save it for next year.
Do you really want to know what your mother wants for Mother's Day? Chances are, she doesn't want you to give her flowers and make her something to eat that will make her gain like 10 lbs in one day and then ignore her until the next Mother's Day. What she really wants is for you to pick up your socks. I mean it. Go right now, pick them up from in front of the television and put them into the laundry basket. Also, it wouldn't kill you to wash a dish now and then. And stop borrowing money. And frankly, there is nothing more considerate (and romantic if you're the husband) than taking out the trash without being asked. Stuff like that just brings tears to my eyes.
Think of your mom for a minute. Think of her when she's 17, maybe 18 years old. She's young, she's hip, she's cool. She's on top of the world. She's going to conquer the world, travel everywhere, she's going to live a fabulous life. That's what she's thinking about. When she was young and flashy and all that, she wasn't ( I assure you) for a moment thinking to herself, "wow, if I had my wish I'd really like to have some kids that I can just nag and nag and nag til I can't stand the sound of my own voice." She really wasn't. But you came along and the moment she saw you she loved you so much she could hardly breathe. And that was it for her. She resigned herself to a life of poopy diapers and vomiting on the rug, and being largely unappreciated, and ....picking up your dirty socks in front of the television. And, knowing, that someday maybe, just maybe, you'll understand acknowledge her as a person- a person who was all that but gave herself over to service out of love for you.
So, today of all days, go to your mom and tell her that you understand and you are really really grateful and that you are going to show her that you are by picking up your socks.
Do you really want to know what your mother wants for Mother's Day? Chances are, she doesn't want you to give her flowers and make her something to eat that will make her gain like 10 lbs in one day and then ignore her until the next Mother's Day. What she really wants is for you to pick up your socks. I mean it. Go right now, pick them up from in front of the television and put them into the laundry basket. Also, it wouldn't kill you to wash a dish now and then. And stop borrowing money. And frankly, there is nothing more considerate (and romantic if you're the husband) than taking out the trash without being asked. Stuff like that just brings tears to my eyes.
Think of your mom for a minute. Think of her when she's 17, maybe 18 years old. She's young, she's hip, she's cool. She's on top of the world. She's going to conquer the world, travel everywhere, she's going to live a fabulous life. That's what she's thinking about. When she was young and flashy and all that, she wasn't ( I assure you) for a moment thinking to herself, "wow, if I had my wish I'd really like to have some kids that I can just nag and nag and nag til I can't stand the sound of my own voice." She really wasn't. But you came along and the moment she saw you she loved you so much she could hardly breathe. And that was it for her. She resigned herself to a life of poopy diapers and vomiting on the rug, and being largely unappreciated, and ....picking up your dirty socks in front of the television. And, knowing, that someday maybe, just maybe, you'll understand acknowledge her as a person- a person who was all that but gave herself over to service out of love for you.
So, today of all days, go to your mom and tell her that you understand and you are really really grateful and that you are going to show her that you are by picking up your socks.
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